In honor of my husband and I’s four year wedding anniversary being this week, I wanted to highlight the love of my life, Xavia Witherspoon (Everyone calls him Zay). My hubby is an avid video game enthusiast and lover of all things Anime and Manga! He loves the Denver Broncos (which is a cardinal sin in Philly where we’re from but that’s besides the point) and he knows more about Marvel comics than anyone I know. He’s also the hardest working, most caring and understanding man I’ve ever met and I’m so blessed that I get to do life with him. So this blog post is to get a man’s perspective on marriage and parenthood and for you guys to better get to know my partner in wrangling our two crazy kids.
1) What are some challenges that you face as a dad?
•Ummm, I guess trying to be patient with the kids. It’s hard because you’re trying to teach them right from wrong but they drive you crazy in the process. I have to remember that they’re still learning. Also balancing being a dad with being me, getting time to be myself.
2) What is something that you struggle with as a husband?
• Probably showing my appreciation for everything that you do as a wife and mom. I show you but not enough. All the things that women do with the house and the kids, they need to be shown appreciation much more.
3) What is the best part about being a dad?
• Just watching them grow and seeing how funny they are. They’re their own person but they still have bits of our personalities. And they’re just so full of love and happiness despite everything going on in the world.
4) What do you love most about being married?
• How we are able to see the flaws in each other to help one another grow as parents and spouses. And how friendly we are and how we treat each other. We’re actually best friends. I think that’s pretty cool.
5) Name one of your embarrassing parenting fails.
• There’s a bunch. One that comes to mind is when Leo was a baby and somehow pooped completely out his diaper and straight into my lap.
6) What is something you want people to know about me as a mom and a wife?
•You are crazy! Naw, I feel like people know everything about you. But maybe that you have really spicy comebacks. You always know exactly what to say to make you feel it in your chest. You’re really hilarious.
7) What advice would you give to new dads?
•Definitely practice how to change a diaper. You need to be pretty fast so you don’t get pooped on. Also try not to get super overwhelmed when the baby is crying. You need to be the calm one especially when mom first gives birth. You need to be her peace when she’s newly postpartum. She went through a lot.
8) What advice would you give to new husbands?
• Ummm, happy wife happy life. I know people say that all the time but it’s true. If you’re wife’s not happy things will be off. They just have being caring and being a wife in them before they get married but we need to figure things out. She’s your partner so listen to her and consider her feelings in things.
9) What traits do you think you inherited from your dad that come out in your parenting?
•I guess being assertive but also caring? Like the kids know who runs the house but they know it’s out of love. My dad used to yell a lot so I try not to yell so much. I just want them to feel how it feels to have a dad that’s present like I did.
10) How has marriage and becoming a dad made you a better man?
• It helped me understand what it meant to be an adult. Like it forces you to work on your patience and showing your love and gratitude. Those are all important in parenting in marriage. I need to patient with y’all but like also do everything with love and appreciation.