I’m going to be honest with you. I’ve felt like I’ve been on an ongoing journey with learning how to prioritize myself in my life, learning to make space for “me”. For some people this may sound silly. “How can you not make space for yourself in your own life?” But for people who have grown up carrying the burdens of other people and the weight of other people’s expectations, I think you’ll identify with the feeling of never truly taking time for yourself.
In most of the relationships in my life I’ve always been the point person in some capacity. The one who acted as a caregiver and problem solver. Being very protective by nature I’ve always welcomed playing this role because of how much it benefited the people I love. But over the years I’ve seen how I’ve let my commitments to other people take up so much space in my life that I’ve left very little for me. The feeling of being stretched in every direction takes a toll after awhile and the aftermath is anything but pretty.
So I made a commitment to myself in 2022, that I would make space for myself and keep my word to myself in whatever area of my life I wanted to see growth. It’s only been a month so far and already so much has changed for me. Here are the areas of my life that I’m making space for myself.
My Fitness Goals
Over the last few months I’ve grown to love working out. Like seriously love it. If you’ve been following my blog for a while then you’ll know that I’ve been on this journey since 2020 and have only recently grown to enjoy it in the last few months. It’s been a long road but I’ve finally been able to see the benefits of my consistency. I find working out to be such a stress reliever and slowly but surely I’ve been crushing the fitness goals I’ve set for myself over the last year.
I reached my first big goal of getting back to the weight I was before I got pregnant with my daughter. And now I’m 2 pounds away from my ultimate fitness goal which is to get to the weight I was before having kids at all. I am so so proud of myself and seeing myself grow stronger makes it so worth making time to workout each day.
I have learned the hard way that I’m not myself when I feel like I’m not in alignment with my faith. Even before I was old enough to fully grasp the fullness of religious practices I’ve always felt a closeness with God. I always prayed and felt that connection that people speak about. I talk about him all the time (to the point that it annoys people I’m sure). But that is where I find peace in the chaos of life. And my relationship with him has been the only true constant I’ve experienced in my life.
So I’ve been making it a point to keep up with my daily devotionals and prayer. But even more than that I’m pushing myself to go outside my comfort zone and get more involved in serving at church. I want to expand that circle of my life and get to know more people who relate to me religiously. I’m also very passionate about my children seeing me serve and leading by example.
My Career Goals
After almost 9 months of being at home with my children full time I finally feel ready to get back out to work. But this time I feel a lot more certain of myself and what I will accept from a position. I refuse to be undervalued or underpaid (Respect will be put on my Masters Degree), I refuse to become stagnant in a position because I want to experience exponential career growth over the next five years and overall I want to maintain an excellent work-life balance. My children are gaining more of their independence daily and I feel like I’m entering a season where I will finally be able to balance work and my home life in a way that feels comfortable for me.
Protecting My Energy & Setting Boundaries
This is probably the biggest way I’ve been making space for myself and what I want this year because it is admittedly the hardest change. I preach all day that about the importance of setting boundaries but never take my own advice. So this year I made a point to change that. I’m limiting access to me when the energy is off or when I feel like something or someone is draining me. I’m not feeding into negativity at all. Most importantly I’m setting boundaries with myself and others that allow me to be more present with my family and in my marriage and I love the difference it has made so far.
It’s so important to make space for yourself in this life. I think it’s so easy to lose yourself and your purpose when you constantly put the needs of others before your own. There is something so rewarding about being selfless and caring for others before yourself but that has a time and place. There’s a season for that, especially in motherhood. But never lose sight of the face that you deserve to take up space. You deserve to be a priority.